Saturday, April 11, 2015

Friday, April 10, 2015

I wouldn't change a thing...

Like anyone, I have regrets.  I wish I had understood women better when I was younger.  I wish I had made better choices in whom I chose as friends when I was young.  I wish I had known that backstabbers existed when I was young (I am thinking of Jim and how he deceived me and gave me the intentionally bad advice that harmed my relationship with Holly).  Yes, I was terribly ignorant of the ways of humans when I was young.

However, I do not regret never having married Holly.  I do not regret divorcing my first wife.  I not only do not regret having fathered a daughter, but I think it was the best thing that happened to me in my life, and as much as her mother turned out to be a great disappointment to me, I know that it is not something she chose to do, so I do not regret staying with her until my daughter became and adult.

I do not regret that I am effectively single now.  In fact, I love it.  There is so much more that I have done, free of these "ball and chains".  There is so much more that I will do, as you will see here in the coming year.  If anything, I regret having wasted a year of my life on Holly and 10 years of my life on Hang, though I learned much from the experiences.

This is not to say that I did not love them, because I did love love, very much.  However, that kind of love is not enough.  There are other more powerful loves, like the love of a parent for a child, and the love of fighting for what is right.  With Holly, I would have been yacked to death by her endless yapping and bored to death with her complete failure to understand anything that requires knowledge and reason.  With Hang, I would have been imprisoned by her love, unable to see the world, fight for those things I believe in, learn those things I wanted to learn, and then, sadly, I would have never become a father.

I wouldn't change any of that if it meant I could not have and be what I have and am now.

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

Happy Birthday

Not that you deserve to be remembered, but Happy Birthday.

Saturday, April 4, 2015

La Mala Rodrígez

Here is una mala that I'd like to...

Monica Lewinsky: The price of shame

I'm posting this to show support for the cause that Monica Lewinsky speaks of.  I too went through a period of online cyber harassment.  The degree to which it was waged upon me was in every way as bad as other cases that resulted in suicide.  Perhaps the biggest difference is that I experienced it for approximately 4 years, nonstop.  The harassment I experienced included publishing offensive articles in my name by the harassers.  My wife, my daughter, and I received death threats by email and online.  I'm talking about a small child and a female immigrant, powerless to fight back against these online harassers.  This made my wife increasingly paranoid.  Today she suffers from schizophrenia.  Personally, I believe this harassment may have contributed to this illness that has destroyed her life.

Once the harassment took hold, other individuals that knew me, such as my ex-wife, her husband, some former coworkers, and other mentally disturbed people joined in.  I know who many of them are.  I could list their full names here, but let me settle for their first names: Holly, Bridget, Elise, Josiah, Jack, Mike, Michael, Doug, Mary, Karen, Jan, Daniel, Jim, Cy, Bill, Gustavo, Laura, Cyndi, John, Hang, and Stephen.  This isn't the whole list, but this is a list of the most vile.  There is a sociological phenomenon that is as old as the human species.  We see it under dictatorial regimes where cowards anonymously turn in or falsely accuse those they dislike or those they are jealous of to the authorities.  We see it online in anonymous bullying where, once it gets started, mentally ill sociopaths gang up on a target simply because they can.  In Salem, it took the form of witch trials.  In the South, it took the form of lynchings.  It is all about killing a person, biologically, mentally, or virtually.  It is all about destroying a life and getting pleasure from it.

However, there is a price these animals have paid for their harassment.  Other people know what they did.  Whether they realize it or not, they have diminished their own lives by being known as someone that has worked to destroy others.  In the case of some, they lost a good friend.  Several of these individuals do not know it, but I did many things to help them and improve their lives, without seeking credit, before they put their masks on and began the harassment, all those years ago.  There is no going back.  One will be visiting my mother late in May.  I won't be there when she comes.  I choose not to be.  She lost a friend by joining the dark side.

Listen to when Monica Lewinsky has to say.  People that do these things are the lowest form of life.  If you know one, shun that person.  They are murderers.

Thursday, April 2, 2015